Anti-Clotting Drug for Stroke Victims A Few for the "Weird but True" File Bat-spit in the belfry? Ooh, and I just missed Halloween on this one! How's this for creepy: A new, experimental anti-clotting drug for stroke victims is currently being tested at the University of Louisville Hospital - and it's based on… Now, normally I wouldn't be reporting on ANY new drug - there are too many of them out there already that do more harm than good - but this one really caught my eye. Why? Because instead of concocting some toxic chemical with nothing but a theory in one hand and test-tube in the other, the German makers of this new medication, called desmoteplase (the name is taken from the Latin name for the vampire bat), took their cues from NATURE before they took to the laboratory. What do I mean? In case you didn't know, the vampire bat - just like the monsters in Bram Stoker's Dracula - survive by drinking the blood of the living. Mostly, they prey on cattle and other large quadrupeds (human bites are rare). Anyway, it generally takes half an hour or so to fill the diminutive vampire bat's tank. Since blood clots up much faster than this, vampires utilize a special protein in their saliva to prevent clotting. And as it turns out, this chemical is a far better anticoagulant than ANY PRESCRIPTION MEDICATION KNOWN TO MAN. See, nature almost always does it better! Preliminary trials on real stroke victims have been promising, and the American Heart Association even included desmoteplase on its "top 10" list of innovations for last year. Now, before you go thinking that I've flown the coop and crossed over to the pro-drug "dark side," consider this: As an M.D., I've written plenty of prescriptions in my life (but only when they were needed, and only for drugs that work!). And as an open-minded and optimistic (really!) human being, I can hope for the best in the future of medicine, drugs and all - especially if some new nature-based medication can help keep stroke victims from suffering permanent brain damage. Besides, popping a pill sure beats letting a squadron of vampires suck on you, right? Oh, but we're not done with the bizarre-o stories, yet…
For those of you who might be a little sketchy as to what angina is, here's a rough definition: A feeling of pain, heaviness, tightness, or squeezing in the chest in reaction to a starvation of the heart for oxygen, blood, and nutrients. This starvation is usually caused by partial (or near-total) blockages of the arteries supplying the heart. Typical treatments for angina range from medication (like nitroglycerin pills) to arterial stents, angioplasty, grafts, and bypass surgery. But whoa, Nelly! Now there's a new treatment option for this common condition that's likely to create quite a buzz… Vibrating trousers! Honest - it's for angina sufferers for whom these other treatments aren't an option. According to a BBC News report, the pants inflate and deflate at a rapid rate around a patient's lower body, producing a sensation that's akin to vibration. Apparently, timing these "vibrations" to a wearer's heartbeat helps not only to increase a starved heart's supply of oxygen-rich blood, but also to help the body generate new blood vessels AROUND arterial blockages. Preliminary testing has yielded some astonishingly positive results, according to supervising doctors. For some, the change has been "life-transforming." Of course, it's still an experimental treatment, so no word yet on how long before angina sufferers can slip on a pair of pulsating pants here in the U.S. of A. But I wonder how long it will be before someone has the bright idea to market them as a treatment for impotence? I can see it now former Viagra pitchman Bob Dole smiling away in trembling trousers, refrains of the Beach Boys in the background… "I'm pickin' up goods vibrations. Oooh, Ooh, good vibrations!" Always discussin' what's got medicine buzzin,'
William Campbell Douglass II, MD | 
